Hi Folks,

I think it's fitting that the regular season wraps up this time of year. Because for me, the NFL season is sort of like Christmas: Tons of anticipation and then it seems to be over before I know it.

I think this has been my favorite season ever. But then I say that every year. I admit it, I'm an NFL junkie. And I'm guessing the fact you're reading this in late December puts you pretty far up the NFL Junkie scale too.

It's OK. They say Recognition is the first step...

Seriously, part of the fun in writing this column is that every week, I know I'll get to share some thoughts with folks like yourself who love football as much as I do. And that strikes me as a very good thing. I've had a blast throwing out my goofy thoughts this season. And I've chuckled at the emails from people telling me they've thought some of the same things as they were watching the games. (the fact these people are having the same thoughts as me should probably concern them....)

Before this turns into a Hallmark card / Winston Wolfe scene, let's get on with this. As I wrap up the regular season in this week 17, I've pulled up some of the more interesting things I remember seeing during the year.

Bottom line is this thing has been an absolute gas to create for you guys. It's my sincerest hope that you've enjoyed reading it 10% as much as I enjoyed writing it. We'll do it again next season. If you've got thoughts and ideas on how this thing can be better, or just want to yell at me about Randy Moss, feel free to shoot me a line at Bryant@footballguys.com.

Here's to Football,

Joe

WEEK 2

Another draft thought. What exactly am I supposed to learn from a video of USC's Winston Justice pancaking a 200 pound guy from Fresno State that'll be working for IBM next summer?

From the How To Win Friends and Influence People department: Last week, disgruntled wide receiver Jerry Porter thought he might make a point when he reportedly decided to park in Al Davis' personal parking spot. Monday night, Porter was reported (and disputed) to be laughing it up on the sidelines as his QB was repeatedly sacked. Some are even saying he was cheering for San Diego. That is not gold, Jerry....

I like Phillip Rivers as much as the next guy. But I'm telling you right now that Charlie Whitehurst as your #2 QB is a bad idea. (Joe's note: Apparently, A.J. Smith felt the same thing and obtained Billy Volek from Tennessee)

John Madden had a great description of Willie Parker - "He was a kid that was never 'it' in tag".

Tiki Barber described the normal look on Eli Manning's face: "It's kind of a blank, searching, the world is coming to an end face. But it works." (In hindsight, it didn't work all that well)

Is it a bad sign for Raider fans that Tony Mandarich was spotted Tuesday sporting a Robert Gallery jersey?...

I've been trying to think of something more stupid than the NCAA College Football Coaches Poll and I've got nothing. Which is fairly significant as I know a lot of stupid things.

The coaches can say all they want but if I'm Jake Plummer or Drew Bledsoe, I'm holding off a bit on remodeling the kitchen. Both these guys could be looking for real estate agents soon....

WEEK 3

In a move that was not widely publicized, the entire Raiders team was deactivated for Sunday's game.

Have you heard the ads for Focus Factor that run on ESPN Radio? As best I can tell, this product is supposed to make you smarter and more attentive. So I'm pretty excited as this could be something I'd need. The ads claim "many people say it's the best brain supplement they've ever tried." I started wondering just how many "brain supplements" there are on the market. And what about the people who said this stuff wasn't the best they've ever tried. And then I started thinking about Clinton Portis and Kid Bro Sweets and forgot all about it....

Running backs have always taken care of their offensive lineman. Gold watches and steak dinners used to be the ticket. San Diego's LaDainian Tomlinson says times have changed though. "These days, taking them out to eat isn't enough for them. They're high maintenance."

College Football note of the day. I live in Knoxville, Tennessee and Air Force was in town to play a couple of weeks ago. My twelve year old son and I were talking about the game when out of the blue he asked me, "Dad, do they fly themselves down for the game?". I don't know the answer there. God bless kids.

College Football note of the day II. To Oklahoma fans: Stop whining. You got screwed. But stop whining. To Oregon fans: Act like you've won something before. Especially since you didn't really win this one. To the NCAA: With a gazillion dollars coming in and no salaries going out (except for USC guys apparently) why have a Mickey Mouse Radio Shack instant replay equipment setup with a guy making $400 a game (seriously) working the replay booth?
That's a disgrace to be that greedy. Do this right and spend a little money.

Marty Schottenheimer turned his young QB loose a little bit Sunday. In Week 1, Philip Rivers was 8 for 11. In Sunday's game, he was 8 for 11 at one point in the first quarter.

Nice start for Houston's David Carr. Sack on the first play. Fumble on the second….

Someone tell Tom Coughlin he doesn't have to do the Rain Man thing and button the top button on his coaching shirt.

Seattle DB Ken Hamlin had a deflected pass bounce right up to his hands and he muffed it. Another Seahawk dropped a sure interception in the play before that. Further proof that if defensive backs could catch, they'd be wide receivers.

You knew it wouldn't take long. Kellen Winslow II found a microphone and someone willing to listen to him Monday. "Some of the coaches might just be holding us back a little. ... We've got nothing to lose... We're losing and I'm not on the field. I just don't get it." This is a guy who's made a career out of holding himself back. I'd agree he doesn't get it. But I have a feeling Romeo Crennel is going to help him understand.

WEEK 4

Any of you guys that questioned Tampa quarterback Chris Simms' toughness need to check yourself. Guy finished a game with a ruptured spleen and led his team down the field in the 4th quarter. Said wide receiver Michael Clayton, "In the huddle, he was gasping for air. He'd call part of the [pass] routes, then gasp for air and finish it. ... You could tell he was fighting it." This picture of Simms picking himself back up again vaults to one of my favorite sports photos

Thanks to our friend Gary Wolverton, I think I figured out a way to clean up this Reggie Bush / Money Under The Table business. Why not just have Atlanta's Warrick Dunn give Bush's parents a house? Everyone wins.

This has to be the funniest animation anyone's sent me this week. I never knew Vince Young was in Napoleon Dynamite....

Minnesota wide receiver Troy Williamson would be a fantastic wide receiver. If he could just catch the ball. Which is sort of important for a wide receiver.

Speaking of Jacksonville, there isn't a pitcher in Major League Baseball with a windup bigger and slower than Byron Leftwich's. It's nearly comical.

I don't mean this in a bad way, but Angry Denny Green makes me think of Red Kool Aid Guy bursting through the wall. Oh Yeahhhhhh. That might go over the head of you younger guys.

Clipped from the Boston Herald this week: Bengals Linebacker Odell Thurman, who was already serving a four-game suspension for violating the NFL's substance abuse policy, was pulled over at a sobriety checkpoint in suburban Cincinnati and charged with DUI. Thurman had a 0.17 blood-alcohol level, more than twice the legal limit in Ohio. In the car with Thurman were teammates Reggie McNeal and Chris Henry. Thurman told police he was the least drunk of the trio, which was why he was driving. Henry was reportedly throwing up out a rear window during the traffic stop.

This is the same Chris Henry that's been arrested four times in three states since last
December and now has to blow into a breathalyzer device before he is allowed to start his car. If you can run real fast and jump real high and catch touchdowns, they'll find a spot for you.

I won't go on about the Monday Night Game in New Orleans other than to simply say that game epitomizes what I love about sports.

Overheard on the radio: Terrell Owens has been upgraded from suicidal to questionable.

Should I be surprised that Terrell Owens' publicist, Kim Etheredge, doesn't have enough public relations sense to take the gum out of her mouth before addressing the media at a press conference?

Joe Theismann had the line of the weekend talking about a ref throwing a flag: "He must have seen something to make him pull it out of his pants." I thought Kornheiser was going to lose it.

New England and Seattle will play in Beijing next year in the inaugural..."China Bowl". I'm not making this up. See for yourself. They made a big deal at halftime of the Patriots - Broncos game as it's tied into the 2008 Olympics somehow. They even had the "Five Friendlies" there, the 2008 Beijing Olympic mascots. Here's what I don't understand: Why do the Olympics need official mascots? Events don't have mascots. Teams and schools have mascots. And further, why do the Olympic mascots have to look like some mutant Pokemon / Telletubbie thing. What's wrong with a bull dog or a cougar or a sweat shop worker for a mascot?

WEEK 5

Chicago's Rex Grossman won the NFC Offensive Player Of The Month for September. Yeah, I saw that coming....

But help me out here. Grossman posted these stats for September: 61-94, 829 yards, 64.9%, 6 TD. 3 INT, 8.82 YPA, 100.9 QB rating

The Eagles' Donovan McNabb posted these numbers: 69-113, 960 yards, 61.1%, 7 TD, 1 INT, 8.50 YPA, 105.3 QB rating

Has anyone told Rush Limbaugh about this?

Even the Nike people know Mike Vick isn't the guy you want throwing the football. In their Briscoe High commercials, they let LaDainian Tomlinson throw the game winning pass. Steve Young's, "Keep your eye on the ball, Ryan" along with Lee Corso as the mascot make these for me.

I see lots of guys drooling over the "Rrrrest stop in Raleigh?" girl in the Verizon ad. I don't get it. She's blonde, appears to have most all her teeth and isn't fat. But I need a little more than that. Sorry.

Secondary point, what it is about Las Vegas that turns relatively normal people into complete dorks? The one guy with his "VEGAS, BAY - BEEE" (accompanied by the apparently mandatory hand jive) along with the other dweeb is just sad.

Random funny Eagles note of the week. I don't know if it's legit, but Philadelphiaweekly.com is reporting that the guy chosen last week as the Lincoln Financial Fan Of The Game was handcuffed and ejected during the game. Here's the story.

One more and I'll stop burying the Raiders (one of my favorite teams so please save the emails) Running back Lamont Jordan averaged almost twice as many yards per carry as QB Andrew Walter posted in average yards per pass attempt. I may not know much, but I know that's not good.

If I were Jerry Jones, I'd have the team doc ready every time Mike Vanderjagt attempted a field goal. Not for the kicker, but for Bill Parcells. I'm not sure how many more 26 yard misses the Big Guy can stand.

Last week, I wrote: "Chad Pennington's looking like the guy they gave all that money to. Pennington now has 44 career touchdown passes without an interception in the red zone. Sorry Jets fans, I'm sure that'll jinx him. He did look kind of funny Sunday lining up as a wide receiver."

On cue Sunday, he threw an interception from the Indianapolis two. Don't doubt me....

The Seahawks are pushing it on the jinx front, don't you think? It wasn't enough that Shaun Alexander had to go out and do the Madden thing. Now Matt Hasselbeck is flirting with disaster promoting Campbell's Chunky soup. What's next, Mike Holmgren on the cover of Sports Illustrated?

WEEK 6

We get it. Every human in the world thinks the Chargers throwback uniforms are great. I like them too but please, you people stop it. You're embarrassing yourselves.

The NFL league leader in pass receptions? That would be Reggie Bush with 34. Hmmm.

I want to know what marketing genius picked out the 85 year old woman to be in the Cialis ads? Old people still have sex. I accept that. But grandma and grandpa in matching bathtubs watching the sunset does not make me want to buy their product.

On the bright side, I am loving the new children's book by Terrell Owens. The title is "Little T Learns To Share". I'm not kidding. I bet the Barber twins are nervous.

Watching the Pittsburgh game, I'll admit the overriding thought bouncing around my head was "Apparently, one does need an appendix." Something is wrong with my brain.

We're friends here so let's be honest. Oakland sucks. Nobody denies that. But please will you people stop with the "Will the Raiders win a game?" talk. I can't tell you which game, but it'll happen. At least once. The Bears have a better chance of going undefeated than do the Raiders of going winless. But neither are going to happen.

If you're an aspiring NFL QB heading off to college, forget about the PAC 10 or SEC, head to the Mid American Conference. Five of Sunday's starting QBs were MAC guys. Chad Pennington and Byron Leftwich from Marshall (from when Marshall was in the MAC), Ben Roethlisberger from Miami of Ohio, Charlie Frye from Akron and Bruce Gradkowski from Toledo. That's pretty cool.

Marshall Faulk has been outstanding on the NFL Networks Total Access show. Last week, he and Rod Woodson discussed the tough Philadelphia fans. Faulk said, "Man they booed Santa."

Woodson made a pretty good point with, "He was a skinny Santa."

Faulk came back, "I don't care, Man. Even if he only had on his coat and no pants, whatever. You don't boo Santa. You can't boo Santa."

WEEK 7

It took until week 6, but Ben Roethlisberger has now thrown for more touchdowns this year than I have...

I received an email this week from a nice lady in Ireland that informed me I was a "Googlewhack". I'm not hip enough to know what that is so I asked our Tech Genius, Keith Overton and he gave me the "For Dummies" version (which he normally does for me). Keith explained that Googlewhacking is a game where one tries to enter two words into Google with the goal of returning only one page found for the search result. Keith has to tell me what is cool and what is not cool in the tech world and Keith said that it was cool to be a Googlewhack. So party on.

The mascot for the Buccaneers is the big headed Pirate guy that runs around. His name is officially "Captain Fear" and he's pretty cool I guess. Tight end Alex Smith scored Sunday, and Captain Fear was the first guy to greet Smith in the endzone. But now they're thinking of changing his name to "Captain Get Knocked On Your Butt".

New Orleans WR Joe Horn asked Saints defensive end Charles Grant to slap him a couple of times in the face before Sunday's game. Grant obliged. John Henderson does the same thing in Jacksonville when he asks the trainer to slap him before the game. But Henderson is a defensive tackle. Note to Horn: Pay closer attention to Big John. This slapping thing almost always works best when the big guy is the one BEING slapped.

I'm all for players wearing long hair. No problem from me. Just understand that what happened with Larry Johnson saving a touchdown by pulling Pittsburgh safety Troy Polamalu down by his hair is part of the deal. Johnson was flagged on the play but that was because he chose to pull Polamalu UP by his hair as well. The tackle was totally clean.

Deion Sanders and Steve Mariucci had this exchange on the tackle:

Sanders: "I saw that happen to a guy in college and he was never the same."

Mariucci: "Who was it?"

Sanders: "Matt Hasselbeck."

Cardinals head coach Denny Green fired offensive coordinator Keith Rowen Tuesday. I wonder if he made Rowen dress up in the sacrificial lamb costume before he let him go?

More on Matt Leinart: He's lost as many games in the last eight days as he did in his USC career. That's nuts.

WEEK 8

No sense wasting any time, let's get right to the type of hard hitting football information you expect out of Random Shots: Things are now much more clear in Kansas City. One might chalk up the great game against San Diego last week and the terrible game against Pittsburgh the week prior to inconsistencies or parity or some of that "any given Sunday" talk. Turns out the Chiefs were just distracted in Pittsburgh. And not by the Steelers...

Jason Whitlock of the Kansas City Star reports this week that some of the Chiefs players were socializing with the women from Passion Parties Saturday night before the Pittsburgh game. Passion Parties is a company that sells "premier sensual products" through parties that are hosted by consultants and a group of friends are invited. Sort of Tupperware meets sex toys. 200 all female Passion Parties consultants held a seminar at the Airport Hyatt Friday and Saturday. According to Mr. Whitlock who interviewed a Passion Parties spokeswoman, seven to ten Chief players joined 30 of the consultants in a simulated "sales party" Saturday night before the game. Coach Herm Edwards had some fairly stern words after the Pittsburgh game and stressed a renewed pre game "focus" before the Chargers game. The results were pretty favorable.

These guys have obviously never seen the Rocky movies. In the immortal words of Mickey, "Women... weaken... the legs!" I swear I don't make this stuff up.

Sorry folks, it's all downhill from here...

I love the talking heads when they discuss Favre. The exact same pass thrown into double coverage will be "fearless" when the WR comes down with the catch and "reckless" when it's intercepted.

Did you bury the Cadillac? Many did. He rolled again Sunday with a pretty good game posting 82 yards on 23 carries. In one of those chicken or the egg stats: Tampa Bay is 8-0 when Williams sees 20 or more carries in the game. I hate those. (OK., we should have left him buried...)

Ronde Barber has two more touchdowns than Tiki. That's got to hurt.

Speaking of kickers, Pittsburgh's Jeff Reed made a tackle by tripping the returner. Those wacky kickers. Even tackle with their legs...

Cardinals note: Everyone thinks Anquan Boldin is great. He's better than that.

The temperatures in Tampa were over 100 on the field. The brain trust at FOX decided they'd show just how hot it really was with a visual aid as they put out a Philly Cheese Steak without the cheese melted along with a block of Philadelphia cream cheese on a big piece of aluminum foil in the sun. I'm not sure what they expected to happen but the Cheese Steak just sort of turned a nasty shade of brown and the cream cheese never moved. I mean didn't move at all.

They should have listened to my favorite food show guy, George Duran from "Ham On The Street". He says, "Cream cheese isn't real cheese but it's damn good." It also doesn't melt on TV.

I'm starting to like the Steve Mariucci / Deion Sanders interaction on the NFL Network post game thing. Mooch asked Deion if he ever kicked. Deion said, "I kicked 'it'. But I never kicked."

How bad is Pink on the Sunday Night intro song? Monday Night's Hank Williams, Jr. was in the booth for a (thankfully) few minutes in the second quarter. Tony Kornheiser asked Williams if he thought about asking Pink to join the huge group of musicians Williams put together for the Monday Night music. Williams was straight to the point, "Not at all. Never did." That's funny.

Later in the broadcast, Jeremy Shockey caught a TD and Mike Tirico had this gem, "Sweet move by a stud player." You could hear both Joe and Tony scooting their chair over away a little.

WEEK 9

Overheard this one: How do you tell the Barber twins apart? Tiki is hoping to catch a TD pass from Eli Manning. Ronde catches TDs from Donovan McNabb. Ouch.

Speaking of Tiki, he had this to say to ESPN analysts Tom Jackson and Michael Irvin after he made a point to call both men out by name on his radio show:

"...I will call them idiots, because they have neither spoken to me, nor any one of my teammates or any of my coaches," Barber said. "Yet all they do is criticize me for being a distraction with this retirement thing."

I like Barber. And I fully support his decision to do whatever he wants to do with his life and career. But there's not a lot of future in calling Tom Jackson an idiot like that.

How 'bout that Tony Romo? I loved Tom Jackson's line this weekend: "Did you see Jerry Jones when they made the change? He looked like someone took his Halloween candy."

I'm not sure one of the Dallas trainers didn't slip something into coach Parcells' Gatorade. Did you see toward the end of the game how he was kissing Keith Davis and turning Terrell Owens' cap sideways?

It didn't take him long to get back to normal though. He was vintage Parcells at the press conference not wanting to let Romo get too high: "It was a big decision to make. It was a hard decision to make. But I'm glad it worked out, temporarily anyway."

Raven linebacker Bart Scott knocked Saints RB Reggie Bush out of the game with an ankle injury. Scott said he was responding to a cheap shot by Bush.

"The media darling, aka the golden boy of the NFL, tried to take a cheap shot at me, so I told him I was going to put some extra on it," Scott told the Baltimore Sun. "He can do all those shakes he wants, but I wasn't going anywhere. I put a little hot sauce on that ankle."

Tuesday, Scott said he has the utmost respect for Bush and by hot sauce, he was talking about New Orleans food, not putting something extra on his tackle. Seriously, I don't make these up.

Nike rules again. The new "The LeBrons" commercials are instant classics. Especially the one at the swimming pool. If I'm Pete Coors, I can my agency right now, open the vault and call the guys responsible for these spots.

They say it's important for new leaders set a tone early and apparently new NFL Commish Roger Goodell intends for that tone to be tough. Steelers owner Dan Rooney was angry over what he felt were blown calls in the Atlanta game and commented, "Those officials ought to be ashamed of themselves.''

The usual penalty for criticizing officials is in the $10,000 range. (unless you're Mike Holmgren after the Super Bowl and then it's $0 but that's another story) Goodell levied Rooney's punishment at a cool $25,000. It's even a little more interesting as Rooney was the co-chair of the commissioner search committee that selected Goodell.

I was looking at the standings Sunday, and four players caught my eye: Jon Kitna, Jake Delhomme, Damon Huard and Tony Romo. What do they all have in common? All were passed over in the draft. That's four pretty good undrafted QBs right there. And to think Tom Brady was almost in that group as well.

WEEK 10

I heard John Cougar Mellencamp has a commercial out for trucks. Anyone seen it?

I love Al Davis. I love High Definition Television. However, I do not love seeing Al Davis on High Definition Television.

My one political thought from Election night. Former University of Tennessee standout and Redskins quarterback Heath Shuler won his race to represent North Carolina in the House of Representatives. Good for him. I only hope he works out better in Washington this time than he did the last time he was there...

I believe we as a television audience pretty much get what we deserve. Here's what NBC thinks we deserve. This is the graphic displayed before halftime of the Sunday Night Game with the sole purpose of making folks hang around after the commercial break:

Toyota Halftime Show
Bob, Cris, Sterling and the Bus

*Dallas vs. Washington Highlights
WE WILL HEAR FROM T.O.

*Cincinnati vs. Baltimore Highlights
WE WILL HEAR FROM CHAD JOHNSON

I don't know about you, but I drop everything if I think I might somehow be fortunate enough to
"HEAR FROM CHAD JOHNSON"...

John Madden got a kick out of it. He said, "Why wouldn't we want to talk to players from the winning side?"

Of course I had to watch. You know, for you guys. I don't expect Jerome Bettis to really be fluent in Spanish but it was kind of funny hearing him talk about Chad Johnson as "OOO-cho cinco". "OH-Cho" there Big Guy.

Then Peter King blew everyone away as he revealed the secret to stopping Rex Grossman: "There's a tip for the New York Giants - hit Grossman early and often." New York fans can only hope that Tom Coughlin was tuned in.

Riddle me this. Why do the powers that be running the ads for CBS News "60 Minutes" program think I would care about Russell Crowe's temper?

WEEK 11

Winner of the "Sucks To Be Me" Award this week: Minnesota RB Artose Pinner. Pinner nullified a 105 yard kick return by his teammate Bethel Johnson with an illegal block to the back. Then he nullified a successful Minnesota onside kick recovery with an offside penalty. The Vikings were unsuccessful on the second attempt. Ouch. (Of course, Pinner got his revenge winning the "Definitely Does NOT Suck To Be Me Award later in the year)

Watching the advertisements for movies, I can't get this question out of my head: Has Peter Travers ever in his life seen a movie that he didn't think was fantastic? You watch.

Colts center Jeff Saturday described Peyton Manning's running style: "A giraffe with his head cut off, mixed." Wide receiver Reggie Wayne said, "We always laugh in film when he's running."

It's a little tedious sometimes but the ESPN guys have their moments Sunday morning. Peyton Manning had said that he could hear the crowd when playing and that sometimes let him know a defender was close to him. Ron Jaworski commented that he'd never heard a player mention hearing the crowd. Mike Ditka said, "The reason Jaws didn't want to hear the crowd is because they were booing."

The first three Bengal TDs were scored by Jeremi Johnson, Rudi Johnson and Chad Johnson. That's a lot of Johnsons scoring. I'm here all week.

The two oldest QBs in the league faced off Sunday with Brad Johnson going against Brett Favre. It was the Geritol Bowl. Do young people even know what Geritol is these days? I haven't thought of that in years.

The best part of the Jets - Patriots game was the "handshake" at the end between Eric Mangini and Bill Belichick. Mangini, the former Belichick pupil seemed like he might do a semi hug but Belichick was having no part of it. That one's a little tough to understand. I've said repeatedly Belichick is the greatest coach of all time. Right now. What's he's done in this day and age is beyond everyone else. But there's no need to go out of your way to be like that with a guy like Mangini.

Mike Golic from ESPN radio made a great point regarding Chicago's 108 yard field goal return: Think about the guys on the field goal kicking team. It's offensive lineman, maybe a defensive tackle or two, the holder who's probably a QB or punter, and the kicker. I like my chances for an athlete like Devin Hester to score against that bunch.

WEEK 12

Sitting at 5-3, Kansas City coach Herman Edwards was talking up Damon Huard as he stressed team "chemistry" and how the QB was the team's "conductor". Edwards was asked point blank if Green would be the starter when he was medically cleared to play. Edwards would not commit: "At this point, I don't have to make that decision."

An ugly loss to Miami in the following week where Huard played very poorly was enough to jog Edwards' memory: "We're going to go with Trent as our starter. This has been his football team for a long time."

Glitch in the Matrix Sunday: Buffalo's Lee Evans scored TWO 83 yard touchdowns in the first quarter. His jersey number: 83 of course. Yeah, I saw that coming.

Tennessee's Vince Young missed the team flight to Philadelphia. I wonder if Jeff Fisher made the "Home Alone - We Forgot Kevin" face when they realized Young wasn't on the plane.

From the "Getting That Out Of The Way Early" department: Houston's David Carr threw an interception on the third play of the game. Then completed 22 consecutive passes.

That's not a misprint: Drew Brees threw for 510 yards Sunday. And it could have been more. By our count, there were at least three dropped passes that would have added 70+ yards.

Speaking of Brees: This was his sixth 300 yard game. That tied the Saints record with Archie Manning. It took Manning 10 years to reach that mark. It took Brees 10 games...

More bad news for the Titans: It's going to be a tough game when a running back is your leading receiver. And it's Ahmard Hall. And he had 28 yards. On one catch. In the fourth quarter.

But they beat the Eagles so what do I know?

The Gaston Gazette had this blurb for you folks placing bets at home: "The Panthers are 2-0 in games in which Steve Smith vomits in the third quarter."

I like Shannon Sharpe a lot. His "you can't cover me in a phone booth" is an all time classic. Sharpe had this on the Colts defense: "There is a reason why the Colts are last in rushing defense. They cannot stop anyone." OK.

NJ.com had an interview with Giants tackle Bob Whitfield recently.

"Steve from Roosevelt" asked Whitfield "Whose backfield would you like to see in motion (and we're not talking football here)?"

Whitfield said, "What's her name? Oh, Suzy Kolber. I know why Joe Namath made a pass at Suzy. Yeah. I mean, she's a very, very excellent reporter. Knows her stuff. Knows her sports. Really does. And she's kind of thick in the britches. She's got a nice saddle. She's got a very nice saddle. You don't have to be drunk to make a pass at that saddle.

For all you single guys looking for the smooth line tonight there you go - "thick in the britches". I'm sure that will just absolutely slay them. Don't say I never gave you anything.

Tampa kicker Matt Bryant was flagged for a personal foul for a late hit on a kickoff. Penalties are never good but you have to like a kicker that will take a personal foul there.

WEEK 13

I used to think differently, but I'm beginning to think Giants RB Tiki Barber isn't much different from any other player. After the Giants loss to Jacksonville where they focused on the pass, Barber had this when talking about the Jaguars tough rush defense forcing the Giants to throw more: "So I think you put yourself halfway to failure to say we can't do something because of another team's personnel," Barber said. "It's a slap in the face of me and a slap of my front five guys. We don't take to that very kindly."

A slap to his "front five guys" when they pass instead of run? Do they not pass block? Is it an insult to ask them to pass block? I hope none of the "idiots" from ESPN question him about this...

Shannon Sharpe didn't mince any words for Falcons owner Arthur Blank who likes to roam the sidelines: "Tell Arthur Blank to stay up in the booth. You barely know the difference between a screen porch and a screen play." I tend to agree with him.

Much has been made of Mike Vick's obscene gesture to fans as he left the game Sunday. Said Vick: "That's not what I'm about. That's not what the Atlanta Falcons are about. I simply lost my cool in the heat of the moment. I apologize and look forward to putting this incident behind me."

Works for me. Next.

I think he'd be crazy to consider it, but I'm hearing the Pete Carroll to the Cardinals whispers again. In hushed and reverent tones, you hear "The Cardinals have a lot of young talent". That's the same thing they told Dennis Green.

ESPN's Mike Irvin was on Dan Patrick's Radio Show this week and had these gems regarding Dallas QB Tony Romo's athletic ability:

"Somewhere, there are some brothers in that line," Irvin said. "I don't know who saw what, where. His great, great, great, great grandma ran over in the hood, or something went down."

Dan Patrick said: "That's the only way to be a great athlete?"

"No," Irvin replied, "that's not the only way. But it's certainly one way. Great, great, great, great grandma pulled one of them studs up outta the barn. 'Come here for a second.' You know, they go out and work in the yard. You know, back in the day. Something like that."

Love him or hate him, you can't say he's boring...

The Lions organization set a new low mocking their former quarterback Joey Harrington in the pre game announcements with a "Piano Man" reference. Harrington is an accomplished piano player and some in Detroit felt piano playing contributed to Harrington's "soft" reputation. Early in the game with the Lions trailing, it seemed like old times for Harrington. He was losing and the Lions fans were booing him. The QB had the last laugh though.

WEEK 14

Raise your hand if you've got Baltimore's Jamal Lewis figured out. Not me. He struggled early in the year. Then came on strong like the player we remembered. His first rush Sunday went for 15 yards. Then he gained just 46 yards on the next 16 carries.

NBA thought: (pay attention as I don't have many of these) Stephon Marbury has created a pretty good buzz with his Starbury One shoe. According to Marbury, the shoe is "Exactly the same as the most expensive kicks on the market," and retails for $14.98. I love the LeBron James commercials but with James' shoes at $149, it's an interesting comparison.

Cadillac Williams is exactly one touchdown ahead of me for the season. I'm thinking it's just about time we went back to calling him Carnell. Seriously.

The Bad News: Chicago's Rex Grossman only completed nine passes Sunday.
The Worse News: Three of them were to Minnesota players. Ouch.

I'm way past the point of being happy I was right about the guy. Now I'm starting to feel sorry for him.

I caught a little flak for ripping the Bears' schedule last week. Are you kidding me? They finish with this gauntlet: St. Louis (5-7), Tampa Bay (3-9), Detroit (2-10) and Green Bay (4-8).

Antonio Bryant was so wide open on his touchdown reception, this Bryant could have scored.

San Francisco's #1 overall pick Alex Smith and New Orleans #2 overall pick Reggie Bush both played on the same La Mesa High School team. Did they ever lose a game?

Denver punter Paul Ernster ran onto the field to punt Sunday but had only his skull cap on with no helmet. He quickly ran back to the sideline and grabbed his helmet in time to sprint back out to line up. Kickers….

I wonder if we'll ever see the pictures Rex Grossman has of Lovie Smith?

WEEK 15

Has there ever been a player out of the state of Florida any more pale than Rex Grossman? Didn't he get any sun when he was down there? Dude glows in the dark.

Speaking of Grossman, here's my serious Bears hypothetical question of the week: Let's assume I could wave the magic BlackEyedJoe 8 Ball and guarantee that for every game left in this season, Rex Grossman would throw for 175 passing yards, zero touchdowns and zero interceptions. Would you take it? I think I would.

You people on the "Devin Hester is Deion Sanders" talk. Please. Stop it. You're embarrassing yourself. I don't ever remember seeing a WR start laughing when he realized Deion Sanders was going to try and cover him one on one. Hester's return skills are obviously there. But he's got a long ways to go defensively. Right now he a lot more Dante Hall than Deion Sanders.

Speaking of Prime Time, he was great after the Thursday night game on NFL Network (in a game that was painfully bare of great things). In the post game wrap up, the analysts were offering their parting shots trying to find a silver lining to the ugly game. Rich Eisen congratulated the Steelers. Steve Mariucci praised the young Cleveland quarterback, Derek Anderson.

When it was Deion's time to talk, he was the only guy that kept it real. He looked right into the camera, smiled, and said, "We'd like to apologize for this game. When we picked it, it was a good idea - Super Bowl Champions. But we understand. Give us another shot Thursday, we promise you it's going to be a good game." You gotta like that.

Deltha O'Neal. You are the weakest link. I mean seriously, if you're sitting around the Bengals locker room, how many guys need to be handcuffed before you start to pay attention? Apparently, the answer is "more than seven" as O'Neal was the eighth Cincinnati player this SEASON to be arrested.

I think I'm with ESPN's Erik Kuselias on this. If I'm Marvin Lewis, I call a meeting for all the players, all the coaches, and everyone else associated with the team that I had authority over. I tell them that for the next guy that gets arrested this season, it will be "Pack your bags, Skippy".

And I'd look right at Carson Palmer and Chad Johnson and Chris Henry and say, "that means you too." But that won't happen. Because they're winning and they won't upset the apple cart. And we as fans will keep buying Coors Light and Ford trucks and being glad that Monday Night Football is almost here. Baaaaaa.

Bill Parcells gave us one for the ages this week. When asked if he was worried about Terrell Owens claiming he didn't hear Parcells' "championship" speech because T.O. Was preoccupied with his upcoming birthday party, Parcells blessed us with this: "No. Because he sucks you guys in. He hears everything I say. OK.? And he can tell me three weeks from now, what I said today. So he sucks you guys right in. So consider yourself sucked."

I know one thing. This league won't be as interesting the day that Parcells isn't in it.

I've never really understood the Lexus commercials where the guy is all geeked up that his wife bought him a new Lexus. Don't most couples pay for the car together? Isn't it really more a situation that they bought themselves a Lexus? Which for most people, means they took out a loan to buy themselves a Lexus? "Merry Christmas, Hon. I signed us up for 60 payments of just $982 a month so you can look like a Trophy Wife / Soccer Mom in that oh so rad GX470? That's joyful?

What size helmet does Adam "Pac Man" Jones wear? Look at him the next time the Titans are on TV. He looks like a bobble head out there.

Al Michaels summed it up pretty well Sunday night on a day when Reggie Bush and Vince Young were spectacular: "Every Texan fan has to be saying, 'What the hell did we do?" It is no coincidence that former GM Charlie Casserly thought retirement sounded awfully good after the draft.

Bengal quarterback Carson Palmer shared his Christmas list with the Dayton Daily News recently. #1 on the list was the new Kevin Federline CD, Playing with Fire. According to Palmer, "A lot of people don't like K-Fed, but he's all right." I promise I'm not making this up

WEEK 16

Just last week I wrote: "If I were in charge of Terrell Owens' future, the first thing I'd do is immediately ban all interviews. Immediately. None. Nada. Zip. Take the fines the league doles out for it. They won't cost him as much money as actually talking to the media does."

Not three days later, he's talking to Rich Eisen and admitting he spit on DeAngelo Hall which cost him $35,000.

When Charger RB LaDainian Tomlinson speaks of legendary running back Jim Brown, he calls him "Mr. Brown". Said Tomlinson, "I looked forward to meeting him. He's 'Mr. Brown' to me. I don't feel like calling him by his first name."

Talk about moving up the charts. Tomlinson entered this season at #32 in career TDs. Heading into week 15, he'd moved up to #12.

Congrats to Packer QB Brett Favre who passed Dan Marino this weekend for the most career completions. I'll have to admit, I don't mind seeing Marino passed. On the CBS studio show, Boomer Esiason tried to compliment Marino saying "If you played in this day and age, you would have all the records, believe me." Marino quipped back, "I do have them all except for that one."

I love Mike Shanahan. It's Week 16 and we still don't know who the starting running back will be.

Quick NBA note. I think Carmelo Anthony had a few extra games tacked onto his suspension for running like a little girl after he slapped the guy. That was pathetic.

I would like to see one game where Chad Johnson is able to stay on the field the entire game and not cramp up. Coach Marvin Harrison had this on Johnson's cramps: "He's just a guy that needs to hydrate. It's part of him. It's from talking too much," Lewis said. "He hyperventilates himself, he dries out, and he needs an I.V."

Thanks for playing along. I hope you have a gas with whatever you're doing in your life. Here's to Football and we'll do this again next season.

Shoot me an email at Bryant@footballguys.com if you've got an idea on how to make this better and thanks for reading this year.

Joe